This post is going to be all about breast feeding. I am sure you are thrilled. If you don't want to hear about it, just move along.
For many people, breastfeeding is awkward. Talking about it is hard for some people. They get uncomfortable. In fact, my health students brought it up because one of their other teachers is talking about it as part of her Human Development unit. I guess she used me as an example. Anyway, they pretty much were trying to get me to be shocked or embarrassed. Little did they know that I do not get embarrassed about this topic anymore. I basically told them: "why be embarrassed, that is what they were made for."
See, our society likes to think that breasts are sexual. Which they are, if you let them be. I have always just thought of them as a piece of fat that sometimes get in the way of sports participation. (I often tell people that God knew exactly who I was going to be and blessed me with small ones.) Media has made it that breasts are very important to a woman's sexuality. Men are obsessed with them. Okay, so maybe not all of them but many are. I find this a little bit offensive. I hate the whole over sexualizaion of women's bodies in general so the boob discussion just gets me fired up.
Seriously, my breasts give nutrition to my baby. And being able to breastfeed him is an amazing experience. I often fall asleep while feeding him because it is just such a relaxing time. He also finds comfort in it and lately it is one of the only things to get him asleep because he is teething. I love it.
Sure, in the beginning, it was very hard. We were rookies at it. I think many women quit trying because they haven't mastered it, it really isn't because they can't. Like I said, Ellis and I had a hard time learning. I was fixated on my low milk production and was pumping when I really should have been learning how to nurse. As soon as I got off the whole "I suck at this," we learned pretty quickly.
Now, please do not be offended if it didn't work out for you. I also feel that many things in parenthood and mommyhood are individual. You get to make choices. Thank heavens that we have things like formula to assist in this. Ellis is actually getting me about half the time and formula for the other half, which with my working and low production has to be the case. This is our journey and we do it our way. Your journey may have been different and that is great. Thank heavens we only have us or the wet nurse as options because I find the whole wet nurse idea a little weird.
The last bit about nursing that I want to include here is the whole nursing in public thing. I can see both sides of the story and have my own opinion. I really think that in the society we live in, it is hard to publicly feed your child. If you decide to uncover, you would probably be reported to the police because of this "lewd" act. I personally don't want to be out there in public. I do think that I should be able to breastfeed in public without judging eyes, if I am covered though. I seriously don't see the big deal because seeing it happen doesn't get me all excited. I think that will be all I have about public breastfeeding.
I like how at church I actually have a room to go to feed Ellis. I There is a special mother's room with two nice chairs, and a changing table. I would just nurse under my cover in church but I know some people could take offense, so I don't. The really cool thing about hanging out in one of those nice pink chairs is that you get to chat with other nursing mothers. These women are my heroes. Mainly because they have more than one wee one and have more experience. One of them has seven kids and I just look up to her. It was also nice to chat with her and know that she couldn't nurse until the last three kiddos. See, it is hard. The other woman I have chatted with is a working mom like me and that is a good thing to hear too because sometimes in my church you can be judged for working instead of staying home. Believe me, if it were in the stars, I would be at home with Ellis and not working, but in order to keep benefits, I work.
And really work is not conducive to breastfeeding I only get to pump once a day. I wonder why my production is still wacky? But I am just going with the flow(no pun intended) and giving Ellis as much as I can. And that must be enough, even if I struggled for a really long time for it to be okay to supplement and feed. It is what it is.