Twenty One Months

Dearest Ellis-
Did you know I still call you by different names?  Many times lately it is just Bubba, but I still call you my little bugs too.  I also look at you a lot lately and say to your Dad: "Dang, he is just so cute, I really think we should keep him."  Your Dad is always silly and one day said: "I think we should quit debating and actually really keep him."  I don't think we ever really questioned because our love from you has always been huge, and it just keeps getting bigger.

I love how full of life you are.  You live in each and every moment and you live it big.  When you are happy, you are big happy.  I love your chuckle and your big smiles.  Your happiness makes me happy.  When you are sad, you let yourself be sad.  You cry and cry and come to one of your parents for comfort.  When you are mad, you are MAD!!!  You stomp your feet, you scream and you sometimes throw things.   Lately, you biggest mad comes from whenever we tell you "No."  You definitely want things your way and you are not afraid of letting us know it either.

As you get older, I hope you keep that sense of what you want.  I hope you won't let society dictate how you express emotion either.  Don't let people tell you that you are "too happy," or to not be mad, because in life you will have times that make you have emotions and they are yours to have and feel. Always remember that it is okay to cry.  Tears are healing and sometimes you will just need to let out some.  Our society is often tough on guys for crying, but I am one Mama who thinks differently.  I once told my brother to quit crying and I have always felt bad for it.  It is okay to be sad sometimes!  If you are sad all the time, then we need to talk about that too.

I hate that you are growing up so fast, but I really do love every little change that comes with you.  Lately, you are walking to the car on your own, when I used to have to carry you everywhere.  Sometimes, as parents, it is hard to let go of being able to do things for your kid, but you have to.  See, you are learning how to be independent and take care of yourself and I need to remember that.

You still love trains, and balloons and puppies.  You can say two of those three words.  You still say "choo, choo" for train.  You also say:  apple, shoe, red, some letters, cracker, mommy, daddy, mama, papa, grandma, grandpa, moon, stroller(man do you love going for walks), backpack(you also love going for hikes), juice, milk, cheese, slide, and many others that I can't think of right now.  You have also put a few words together like when I played softball last week and you said "Mommy baseball."  This last week you have started to say "more" rather than signing it.  It is really cute because you say it and still sign it.

You love to give me loves lately, which I also love.  You hug me and say "mmmm."  You also have recently been kissing us and making the sound.  It is so dang cute.

You love church because you get to play with your friend Lincoln and others.  You truly are a very social bug.  I like how you always go up to other kids and try to kiss them and get them to pay attention to you.  You remind me that I should be nice to everybody.

You make us laugh lately because you find it hilarious if we get hurt.  (We are hoping it is a phase and not indication that you are a psychopath later)  Daddy thinks it is very funny to pretend to hurt himself because you laugh and laugh.  The video above is you doing just that.

I love being your mom.  I hope you remember that in your teen years when I may be tough on you sometimes.  I am so excited for it to be summer here in a few weeks making us be able to have more time together because I won't be at work.  We will have so many adventures.  I look forward to see what those adventures will be.  You are amazing and I love you so much.